Today we live in a world in which we are becoming more aware of the spectrum of gender. We have terms to describe our gender identity that were not even thought of or discussed out loud 50 years ago. Today we have not only transgender, but we have bigender, gender fluid, gender nonconforming, genderqueer, pan gender, non binary, trans masculine, trans feminine, neutrois and a host of many others. What does this all mean? I’ll admit even being transgender myself it gets confusing. So if it is complicated for even some of us in the community, how are we to expect our cisgender friends to get it? So for this week’s rant I beg to ask the question… are we all just intersexed?

Science currently defines intersex as a condition where there is a variation either in one’s physical sex or chromosomes. Many people who are classified as intersexed still go through the same identity issues those in the transgender community do including experiencing gender dysphoria. So could intersex be more than just the physical? We are already learning more and more that gender is certainly not physical sex as defined by genitals. We are learning that the only physical part of gender is the brain itself.

“Is anyone 100% male or 100% female?”

By asking if we are all intersexed I am not speaking about the transgender community alone. I mean everyone, transgender, cisgender and all the variations in-between. Think about it for a moment. Is anyone 100% male or 100% female? I know so many self identified men who have traits that would normally be considered feminine. I also know cisgender women who have masculine traits. Perhaps we are all a dot somewhere along the line of the gender spectrum?

Gendr scale 2Society looks at gender as static and binary. We are socialized according to these rules. Boys do “A” and girls do “B”. We chastise those who do not conform to this model. This is based in fear and a lack of understanding. Think about it. If Dad wants to put on lipstick or mom wants to play football the average person would think they went crazy. But what is wrong with these behaviors? Where did these rules come from? Will the whole world collapse if we do not conform to these archaic standards? I certainly don’t think so. I think even science sometimes falls victim to these rules as well. They are looking at sex as binary in their theories. This thinking needs to change.

“I think a day will come where we will look back at our need to define and divide everyone as an antiquated and ignorant concept.”

I see this as part of our natural evolution as humans. We are meant to become more aware of our variations and I hope the acceptance of them will lead to a greater good. As we understand each other more we will spend less time dividing ourselves and start working together. This would open up a whole avenue to new ideas, new stories and a new sense of purpose. I believe we are seeing the beginning of that now. I think a day will come where we will look back at our need to define and divide everyone as an antiquated and ignorant concept.

“Therefore it can well be said that, actually, we are all “intersexes,” anatomically as well as endocrinologically. But we are male or female in the anatomical or endocrine sense, according to the predominant structures or hormones.” – Harry Benjamin

So maybe there is more to the intersex condition than we are currently aware. Perhaps there is a better word for this concept. I am certainly not a scientist. All I know is someone like myself is flipped on that spectrum. That is how I understand it and most people are somewhere in between.

I often speak about us coming together. Not just in our community, but society as well. I just see change starting with us. I hope we all continue to educate the people around us and work towards creating a better understanding of who we are. So are we all just intesrsexed? I look forward to your comments below.

Stay safe and keep fighting for all of us!

Love and Peace,

Mila Madison